Write in "Me" for every office. Who else is fit to lead you?
Seriously though, go out and Vote! Because if you cast the right vote wars will magically end, the economy built on exploitation will suddenly pay fair wages, actors will fall in love with their stalkers, cars will suddenly run on seawater, people in the ozarks will get teeth, racism will cease to be a problem, all police brutality will end.
BUT MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL: The person YOU support is certainly not a corrupt say-anything carreer politician who is owned by big industries, lobbies and/or unions who would rather penetrate you sexually with a switchblade then give up an inch of their power or a cent of their money for the greater good. No way, because whatever political party you're supporting isn't a cadre of corrupt murderers, sniviling syncophants and spinless leeches. Nuh uh!
So yeah, "go vote", Hero. You're saving the 'effing world, appairently.
I'm reminded of a quote from good 'ol saint George, may he rest in peace:
"I'm happy to tell you that on election day I stayed home. And I did essentially what you did. The only difference is when I got finished masturbating I had something to show for it."
So go vote. And by "vote" I mean "away from me you self-deluding pile of living feces."
Oh, and by all means feel free to leave a bunch of self-important comments about how I'm not helping to save the world but you are because a tree died for you to scibble "puppet # 1 please" on it's flattened bleached corpse. Don't go out and feed a homeless person. Don't step in and put an end to the domestic violence raging across the apartment hallway. Don't tutor an autistic child. Vote. And then find someone who doesn't think you're Jesus and act all high-and-mighty to them.
I hate your species.
Seriously though, go out and Vote! Because if you cast the right vote wars will magically end, the economy built on exploitation will suddenly pay fair wages, actors will fall in love with their stalkers, cars will suddenly run on seawater, people in the ozarks will get teeth, racism will cease to be a problem, all police brutality will end.
BUT MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL: The person YOU support is certainly not a corrupt say-anything carreer politician who is owned by big industries, lobbies and/or unions who would rather penetrate you sexually with a switchblade then give up an inch of their power or a cent of their money for the greater good. No way, because whatever political party you're supporting isn't a cadre of corrupt murderers, sniviling syncophants and spinless leeches. Nuh uh!
So yeah, "go vote", Hero. You're saving the 'effing world, appairently.
I'm reminded of a quote from good 'ol saint George, may he rest in peace:
"I'm happy to tell you that on election day I stayed home. And I did essentially what you did. The only difference is when I got finished masturbating I had something to show for it."
So go vote. And by "vote" I mean "away from me you self-deluding pile of living feces."
Oh, and by all means feel free to leave a bunch of self-important comments about how I'm not helping to save the world but you are because a tree died for you to scibble "puppet # 1 please" on it's flattened bleached corpse. Don't go out and feed a homeless person. Don't step in and put an end to the domestic violence raging across the apartment hallway. Don't tutor an autistic child. Vote. And then find someone who doesn't think you're Jesus and act all high-and-mighty to them.
I hate your species.
2 comments:
Hah! Pure genius! Sub-genius, even!
excellent points and the details are more precise than elsewhere, thanks.
- Norman
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